For many people, Eid is a time of ritual, food and family, but for some queer Muslims it can be both joyous and complicated. Rayyan Aboobaker, a Just Like Us ambassador, describes growing up walking a tightrope between faith and identity, learning to honor tradition while protecting a fragile sense of self. In these opening reflections Rayyan outlines how small adaptations — from new conversation habits at the dinner table to private forms of worship — helped create personal breathing room. The narrative that follows balances lived experience with practical ideas for anyone wanting to support queer people in Muslim communities.
Published: 20/03/2026 17:00. This piece is about more than one person’s story; it is an invitation to imagine Eid as a space that can change and still remain meaningful. Rayyan positions belonging not as an either/or dilemma but as a practice: active listening, gentle boundary-setting and the reworking of rituals so they can hold multiple truths. By sharing concrete moments from family gatherings and community events, Rayyan shows how love and honesty can coexist even when beliefs and identities appear to conflict.
Balancing belief and identity
Rayyan’s account begins with the daily negotiations that shaped their childhood: private prayers, coded conversations and the slow learning of when to reveal parts of themselves. For many queer Muslims, these are not one-off decisions but ongoing strategies of care. The strategies Rayyan describes include setting small boundaries with relatives, rehearsing phrases to deflect intrusive questions, and finding allies within faith communities who can vouch for dignity and respect. These approaches are practical, not performative; they aim to preserve safety while maintaining a connection to religious practice and to the people who matter.
Carving community and ritual
Celebrating Eid can be reimagined without abandoning reverence. Rayyan explains how rituals can be adapted: choosing which traditions to keep, which to transform and which to create anew. Hospitality, shared meals and storytelling remain central, but the shape of gatherings can shift to be more inclusive — from seating arrangements that respect comfort to conversations guided by consent. Rayyan highlights that change often starts quietly, with one person modelling a different way of being, and then expanding as others see the possibility of an inclusive celebration.
Shared traditions reimagined
Small shifts can have big emotional effects. Rayyan suggests practical swaps — like offering alternative greeting phrases, or defining a moment during the meal for everyone to express gratitude in ways that don’t center gender or heteronormative assumptions. These adaptations are not erasures; they are intentional designs that preserve the soul of the festival while acknowledging the diverse realities of participants. Through these proposals, Rayyan demonstrates how the fabric of tradition can be mended to include missing threads without losing its pattern.
Private rituals, public pride
Alongside communal changes, Rayyan values private acts of devotion and self-affirmation. Quiet prayers, journaling about spiritual journeys and choosing to wear or not wear certain symbols at gatherings are methods of self-care that make public celebrations sustainable. These practices are described as forms of personal ritual that feed resilience. Rayyan emphasizes that visibility is not a single event but a series of choices, and that protecting one’s mental and emotional health is itself a sacred practice.
Looking ahead: visibility, empathy and action
Rayyan closes with a call for compassion and concrete support from families, religious leaders and wider communities. Simple acts — asking open questions, refusing to gossip, amplifying queer Muslim voices — can change how people experience holy days. Rayyan urges institutions to create safer spaces and for individuals to practice humility when they don’t have all the answers. By centring empathy and practical solidarity, the hope is that future festivals will be celebrations where more people feel fully seen and welcome.