Imagine a world where every word is taken at face value, where idioms are puzzles, and social cues are cryptic messages. This is the reality for many autistic individuals, including author and content creator Ella Willis. Diagnosed with autism at 22Willis has spent years unraveling the intricacies of literal thinking and its profound impact on her life.
Literal thinking is often misunderstood as merely taking idioms literally, but it encompasses much more. For Willis, it influences communication, friendships, work, and even her queer identity. Her journey began at 19when she first realized she might be autistic, and culminated in her book Literally: A Joyful Guide To The Ups And Downs Of Being Autistic.
Navigating the Nuances of Communication
One of the most challenging aspects of literal thinking is navigating social interactions. Willis recalls an incident with her former boss, who often asked, “How has your day been?” Willis would respond with a simple “good,” not realizing that her boss expected a detailed account of her day. This misunderstanding highlights the struggle of not recognizing social nuances.
“No, Ella, there isn’t an actual piece of cake,” Willis remembers being told when she took the phrase “piece of cake” literally. These moments, while sometimes humorous, underscore the real consequences of not understanding implied meanings. Willis emphasizes that literal thinking is not about being a mind reader but about recognizing the unspoken rules of social interaction.
The Intersection of Literal Thinking and Identity
Willis’s journey of self-discovery extended beyond her autism diagnosis to her queer identity. She realized that literal thinking had influenced her understanding of herself and her place in the world. The rigid labels and expectations associated with certain identities, such as being non-binaryinitially confused her.
“I fell right into the trap of assuming that I needed to be androgynous and completely abandon the image of femininity,” Willis admits. She soon learned that non-binary is an umbrella term encompassing a wide range of expressions and identities, none of which require conformity to rigid expectations. This realization was a significant step in her journey towards self-acceptance.
The Freeing Power of Understanding
Unpacking literal thinking has been a liberating experience for Willis. She wrote Literally to help others expand their understanding of autism and literal thinking. The book serves as a guide for autistic individuals and their loved ones, offering insights into why they think, feel, and act in certain ways.
“Everyone deserves the comfort of understanding their own brain,” Willis states. Her book provides resources and answers that can bring a sense of calm amidst the chaos of literal thinking. Whether you are autistic or love someone who is, having these answers can be a game-changer.
Literally: A Joyful Guide To The Ups And Downs Of Being Autistic by Ella Willis is available now in hardback, ebook, and audio formats from Bluebird. For those interested in media made by and for LGBTQIA+ women and gender-diverse people, DIVA magazine has been a beacon for over 30 years. You can support queer media by visiting their link or learning more about the DIVA Charitable Trust.
